“Star Wars”: Spoiler Free “Force Awakens” Review

Let me start by saying that yes, it IS quite a world and age we live in when the most anticipated films are superhero based and the classic cosmic conflict brought to life again.  There is something to be said for the “Age of Fandom”, where it seems you cannot toss a training droid without it hitting someone who identifies as a ‘geek’.  I will do my best to dance around specifics for anyone who HASN’T seen the film yet, but I am making the assumption that you have at the very least watched the trailers, seen the posters, and know the names of the new characters in so far as they have been publically released.

I’m here specifically to talk about the most anticipated film of the last 10 years (aside from Mad Max, because that was the one I was waiting for) that opened officially today.  Star Wars: The Force Awakens has taken the world by storm, the Disney money machine churning out every possible marketing item imaginable, returning the franchise to a household name (as if it ever left!).

If you are one of the verbose fanboys and girls who HATED J.J. Abrams’ 2009 Star Trek reboot, chances are you will have issues with TFA.  I say this because to me, it felt like JJ took every humorous moment that worked from Trek ’09 and recycled it.

Remember this “numb tongue-I can fix that” gem?

If you haven’t seen TFA yet, when you do, you’ll understand this.  The phrase “I can do that/I can fix that” is uttered many times by our three new heroes Rey, Finn, and Poe Dameron. Not that there is anything wrong with reusing things, but I was honestly hoping for more original humor, and less expected laugh lines. Nitpicking?  Maybe.

I will say that allowing more than one character to have a funny line was a good call, the biggest mistake of the prequels was trying to push ALL the jokes onto Jar-Jar instead of parceling out the snicker-worthy quotes.  On this as with many things I agree with MovieBob. But at times the amusing banter seemed forced (ha, get it?) and not at all relevant to our (the audience’s) understanding of the character or the situation.

The classic optimism of young Luke, Leia, and Han was captured well with Poe, Rey, and Finn, maybe a little too on the nose, but something that’ll be interesting to see develop in the upcoming continuations.

On that same emotional point, some of the OVERLY DRAMATIC moments went on for maybe a beat or three too long, going past the point of ‘the audience gets it’ into ‘boy, this is really awkward’.  Which is completely a JJ-ism, and not something well suited to the ‘Wars narrative.

AND WHY SO LITTLE CAPTAIN PHASMA?!?  I get that she’s supposed to be the ‘new Boba Fett’, but for frak’s sake, some of us were really looking forward to some juicy Gwendoline Christie moments.  Blarg.

What about fanservice? Man, if there was anymore, it’d be an X-Rated film.  I can see the headlines now- STAR WARS FANS CAUGHT MASTERBATING IN THEATER BECAUSE OF X-WING/TIE FIGHTER BATTLE, and something-something related to Han and Chewie.  There IS force choking, there ARE lightsaber battles, there most definitely is some brilliant space dogfight scenes.  Our favorite character themes are alive and well thanks to the brilliance of John Williams, and the general feel of the classic trilogy is present, albeit with more measured easy laughs.

Did I enjoy it?  I did.  Did I love it?  No.  Do I think it measures up to ALL the hype?  No.  My 9 year old LOVED IT, and that is really all that matters.  Go see it, take your loved ones, then go home and rewatch the original trilogy.

And may the Force be with you.  Always.